Even if you are able to align your words and actions, sometimes we struggle with our thoughts. We all have or have known someone who is either openly, or passively mean, rude or just down right terrible. I am going to share with you the things I do mentally to help my Karma at thought level.
(If you have other things you do to help yourself feel free to share.)
- Ignore them/distract yourself – This is a basic move for any pacifist, but it doesn’t always work well by itself. The truth is that holding our tongue, or not doing anything mean back is one thing but not thinking terrible things is another realm. This move is best used on people we don’t know well, barely ever seen, or have only met once. Say you work in customer service, and you deal with a horrible person, while they are still engaging you, shut out snide comments you may have running through your head, think about something else, and try to only focus on the facts, or think about nothing at all. This persons presence, is fleeting, do not let it affect you. Your Karma, and your mental well-being for that matter, are more important.
- Tone – If someone’s words are not necessarily unkind, but their attitude and vocal tone state otherwise then pretend. Pretend like they sound calm, mentally extract the negativity from their voice. (I know this is hard for us empathetic folks, but it’s so helpful. It actually helps me to stay calm, stressful situations. )
- Understand/Empathize Mentally – Do you have a person in your life that is always pushing you towards negativity? What do you know about that person? Perhaps, they are just having a bad day or they hate their job. Or maybe there is something in their past, that might be the cause of how they are in the present. While we can’t control how others act, we can visualize that they will someday overcome their struggle(s), whatever is it making them how they are in the present, and hope they will grow/change. We can decide in our mind, that we will not think bad things about or wish bad things on someone that has treated us unfairly. Once we set out and adjust our mentality about them, it’s easier to actually deal with them as well. (This one takes some practice for sure.)
- Make it up- What if you don’t know this person? Make something up! Give them a back story. Could be some something simple, or complex. It doesn’t matter if you decide the guy yelling at you in traffic, is a scientist who just lost, his job and is upset Pluto isn’t classified a planet. Make up anything that will allow you not to dwell.
- Balance – Let’s say that I cuss at the guy who cut me off, and hope in my head something bad happens to him. As quickly as possible, I stop myself from thinking negative things and see what I can do remedy it. Maybe, I’ll let every car that I can go before me for the rest of the day. Or hold doors for people, even if it’s down pouring, or I’m running late. For every, negative thought, I try to have a dozen nice ones.
- Meditate/ Cleanse– If nothing else works, and you give into negative thinking, do some self-repairing. Mediate, in any way that works for you. Cleanse your energy in any way that works as well.
The most important things to remember are that different people and situations, call for varying thought processes. Also what works for me might not for someone else, but as long as we are sincere and work hard at it, we can find a bit more balance of Karma and Peace in our daily lives.